Frozen

I couldn't come up with a different name..

home sweet home!!! as everyone, my home is one place i cherish the most. now i'm home, in my room and thinking about what all could have happened if i'm not here...that leads to a chance. chances are likely to both sides. I could be either here or somewhere else. i'm here at this moment so i'm not present in the other scenario but if i was at the other scene, i won't be here. so i have to be somewhere, it doesn't matter if its point A or point B. I'm here. that is true so I exist at this moment.
Existing doesn't always mean living.. we exist in many ways inside us..our mind makes us play a lot of roles everyday. some for yourself, some for others, some for someone we would never know..we just do things. most of the time in our own accordance but at times we just do it.
So there'a chance for an opposite too, actually i believe its not a chance but its reality. the opposite is nothing but numbness. total inactivity or partial inactivity. i'm experiencing the latter now. i thought to write a lot of subjects..there're things to be written too but i can't. my fingers are frozen. just the noise of fan in this room makes me aware of some movement happens around me. then i hate the sound of keyboard the other sound in the room, but without it i can't type too..so is this a choice i have to take? again choices..
who am i to decide?
if i decide to to write, i should bare the sound of keyboard..if i choose to be silent, no movement will be there..obviously this post also..
everything is based on a choice now..
there's no meaning for what all i typed now.
but if i never did type it, i'll forget this feeling in one day. so i typed it
so the purpose was always to do something, i typed, i saved..it doesn't mean it was productive for me
as i said before
we just do things!
I just typed!!!
was there a choice in this???